by Melissa Parkin
The creators of Glee
and American Horror Story bring us a
twisted horror spoof of bitchy proportions. On the twentieth anniversary of a
sorority sister’s death, Wallace University’s campus is plagued by a series of
grisly murders by the masked Red Devil. From all the promotional trailers and
TV spots, the show played up the tongue-in-cheek self-awareness of the horror
genre that made Wes Craven’s Scream
so brilliant. Co-creator Ryan Murphy even stated that the series would be Halloween meets Heathers. Given the showrunners’ credentials, and the eclectic cast
of characters, Scream Queens seemed
to have all the ingredients to be something truly special. What we got though can’t
justly be summed up in a mere sentence.
Emma Roberts stars as Chanel Oberlin, the malicious president
of everybody’s nightmarish idea of a sorority named Kappa Kappa Tau. She meets
her match in Dean Munsch (the original Scream Queen herself, Jamie Lee Curtis).
Determined to take down Chanel and her vile sorority, Munsch kills the prized
exclusivity of Kappa by allowing anyone to pledge to the sorority. As you’d
imagine, every ideal pledge bolts, leaving only the runts of the litter (including
a nerdy blogger who enjoys eating candle wax) to endure Hell Week. Just as the
hazing begins, so does a string of murders—like an outlandish lawnmower
decapitation—by someone dressed as the school’s infamous mascot, the Red Devil.
Despite what its marketing claimed, Scream Queens is not a horror show, but more of a spoof
of the genre. Everything is essentially played for laughs; some jokes hit their
marks while others…not so much. Strangely enough, the peculiar layouts of each murder are the funniest bits of each episode. The dialogue, on the other hand, is very hit or
miss. It’s overly apparent in the sorority sisters’ pop-culturally fueled monologues
that the writers are trying to be snappy and sarcastic. Try describing sex as
being, “Eiffel Towered by two hot morons who are brothers,” or “spit-roasted by
hot golf frat twins,” and not feel like you’re trying way, waaaaay too hard.
It’s impossible. The members of Kappa Kappa Tau in general aren’t likeable.
Everything about the girls, especially Chanel, is mean-spirited, but not in the
fabulously-evil Regina George kind of way. If anything, you’ll root for the Red
Devil to go Michael Myers on all of them from the moment they’re introduced.
This week’s episode “Chainsaw” thankfully takes some focus
away from the Kappa girls, and it’s a riotous laugh. The brief introduction to
the new school mascot, Coney, displays what true spoofs can accomplish. Imagine
two school mascots literally fighting to the death as Wham’s “I’m Your Man”
plays in the background and try not laughing. As for the main cast, notorious
man-whore Chad Radwell and his fraternity brothers steal the show. The best
moment of the entire series so far comes from the members of the Dickie Dollar
Scholars fraternity.
This dimwitted pack of frat boys, whose combined IQ would be
lucky to reach the triple digits, miraculously figure out that their recently
deceased brother didn’t commit suicide, but was probably murdered. In an act of
retribution, the DDS go “ghetto” by arming themselves with baseball bats as
they prowl the streets, attacking anything and everything that’s red—from fire
hydrants to cars—in an attempt to lure out the Red Devil. The absurdity of
their plan to face a chainsaw wielding psychopath with nothing but wooden bats
is made all the more hysterical by the fact that they’re all dressed in
head-to-toe white country club apparel. The Backstreet Boys’ “Everybody
(Backstreet’s Back)” plays in the background. That’s “ghetto code” for ya. As
the lyrics order you to “throw your hands up in the air,” one of the two masked
Red Devils that confronts the DDS saws both arms off one of the frat members.
In the very next time slot over on FX, The
Bastard Executioner delivers the same brutal slaying, but it outright loses
its effectiveness in comparison to the cartoonish take on SQ. This scene is easily going to be the best clip of any
television series to air this week.
That fact is part of the problem. Despite that
the show is called Scream Queens, the
antics of Chad Radwell, the boys of DDS, and the killer are what makes each
episode worth watching. The girls leading the sorority rarely ever deliver the
goods. Roberts is essentially playing the same character she portrayed in American Horror Story: Coven. Abigail
Breslin seems miscast in the role of a minion sorority sister. Niecy Nash, on
the other hand, deserves proper kudos for her caricature role as Denise
Hemphill, the world’s most ill-equipped security guard. The overall unevenness
of the show makes for a rather jarring viewing experience. It has you itching
to hit the fast-forward button during at least half the scenes, yet also
provokes you to re-watch the few exceptionally orchestrated scenes that will
stay with you long after viewing. It’s still too early to give a verdict on the
overall series, but for potential watchers, you’ve been warned.
Scream Queens’ “Chainsaw” Rating: B-
Overall Series Rating:
C-
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